"Give thanks with a grateful heart..."

Thanksgiving...the day holds so many different meanings for me. Yes, it's a time to reflect on the past year and count my blessings...most definitely. And there are many. My husband and three amazing children, my family and friends, the job I have that allows me freedom to be with those I love and care for when I'm needed. It's also the anniversary of my daddy's death. And even though 35 years have passed since that dark morning of our lives, some years it seems like only yesterday. This year is one of those years. I miss him, plain and simple. I long for his presence and his hugs. I wish Roger and the kids could've known him. And if it's possible for him to know, I can see him beaming with pride at the size to which his family has grown. He loved his family and doted on his grandchildren. We aren't perfect...but we're his. I see him in so many of my nephews and even in my own sons. It's really awesome, young men who barely knew, or never knew him...yet so like him. Then there's the fact that Lisa is gone. True, we didn't celebrate this holiday together, but the fact still remains, she's gone. I miss her...A year ago we were both anointed for different health reasons. We've both been healed in His own way. That's hard for me. I'm still here and she isn't...why? The day I was anointed, she held me in her arms as I sobbed, and over and over again she said, "it's going to be ok. God loves you so much, and so do I." And when I had calmed, I looked up and there was Cassie, fervently praying for her Great Aunt...how humbling that was for me, but what an example of the faith instilled in those girls by their mom and dad. I knew then and there that God would see me through the dark days of depression and I would be healed. Nicki encouraged me almost daily with emails and prayers and hugs when she saw me. Over and over again Nadine would tell me to hang in there, God was working in me, she could see it. What an amazing family God has given me! And when I deserved it least, my children loved me, they never let me down. There are many more instances I could relate, these are what come to mind right now. The past year has been a journey...a path I'd rather not take again...though filled with precious times, it's been rough and I want to keep moving forward, becoming more like Him. "I want to leave a legacy..." I want some day for my children and grandchildren if I'm so blessed, to remember me as a woman who loved the Lord and put her family and others above all else.